My Friend Ben

[AlFike]

It was almost a year ago that Jeanne, Geoff and I set out for Namibia as the DLSF reps to see what Helge was doing in a place called Drimiopsis in the Namibian desert. It was such a truly God Guided trip and our happiness of being with Helge on her home turf was with us each day we were together. I must admit that I felt some trepidation when we set out to visit the Drimiopsis camp where Helge is in the process of building an orphanage there. I have seen lots of poverty in our travels to many third world countries and expected to see lots in the camp but I feared my own reflexive reactions which are a combination of anguish for the conditions, guilt for what I have and a bit of repulsion towards those living in such states of deprivation. This is a typical western reaction to how a good portion of the world lives. Having been plunked down onto such foreign soil can certainly be a shock to the senses. In my case I felt exactly as anticipated. I was choked up most of the time when we were there even as the people greeted us with open arms and joyous smiles.

One person stood out from the crowd and struck me deep within my heart. His name was Ben. He was an orphan boy about 12 or 13 who clearly had some disabilities probably resulting from Fetal Alcohol Syndrome since alcoholism is rampant in the camp. He was living rough in the bush and his clothes were torn and dirty.He was one of the first to greet us with a smile and a 'how are you?'. When we responded he would always say that he was fine .He loved to give high fives and considered himself a sort of ambassador showing us around and staying close wherever we went. He was a constant fixture in our activities there and I know that Helge had a special interest in him and his plight and she mothered him as much as she was able

Kids like Ben are victims in many ways. Many strikes are against such vulnerable children as he had no parents, no shelter and very little to sustain him. Everyone there had the challenge of how to survive each day but Ben's challenges were further hampered by his mental disabilities.He was one of the lowest of the low in this camp of many who are hard on their luck. He was a scape goat of sorts for the other kids who picked on him and he was often beaten up by the older kids who used him to vent their own frustrations so Ben's life was one of pain and deprivation even greater than most who lived there. He was bottom of the heap and what he endured must have been beyond any of our abilities to comprehend. Bruises and scars were evident, showing the world that he was indeed the scapegoat for many disturbed children. Yet Ben had compassion and caring in him in spades. He reached out to us in loving ways and he emanated a love which immediately drew me to him. I also recognized something in him that was also in me. That special pain that is wrought from being different and alone. As a child I too felt that pain, not fitting in and being the victim of bullying and harassment. I'm not trying to compare my life to his which would be foolish but there was a resonance and as we continued to bond with him, we felt like we needed to lift him out of this hell. I wanted to rescue him by taking him home with us. My heart was that moved by his plight and my own recognition of a need to heal him and maybe heal myself as well in the process. It was a powerful pull and it haunts me even today.

Today we received word from Helge that Ben passed over into spirit after a short illness. I must confess that my heart is broken for Ben and this inevitable fate as the lost child that he was. He lives on in my mind with very fond memories but I feel such remorse that maybe we could have saved him. The practicalities of such things are onerous and complex. It is one thing to wish to rescue someone and another to actually do it. The road to hell has been paved with good intentions countless times in our world. My desire to enfold him and bring him into our world may have been too much for Ben and for us. We'll never know now as he is now in a different, I hope more loving place. Ben's physical difficulties are no more. I hope that now his loving spirit can be expressed in all its beauty and strength. Ben, may you find peace my dear friend in a world more suited to you. A world where love is a greater currency than physical strength and power. You pass over into a world where you are wealthy and this will carry you far into greater light. You have been set free. Someday we will meet again and you can tell me all about your adventures in spirit. We will high five each other and smile in recognition of our soul bond. I wish you well on your journey my dear sensitive boy and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I will always remember that time when you stroked my arm and gave me strength and comfort as I talked to the elders. You may have done so out of curiosity because your people are not so hairy but for me it was a comfort and it told me so much about who you are.I remember later that day our dear guide Confucius mentioned you in a message during our prayer. He said:

" Like the dear soul who patted this instrument’s arm, his love was felt. Is he not a channel of

God’s Love? This simple and vulnerable child gave love. "

Yes you gave love my brave child even when you were in a place of no love. You are the strongest soul I have ever met. It will be your gift and strength as you move forward. My love is with you. You have taught me much in a very short time and you will remain in my heart always. With love and gratitude......Al

[Geoff]

Yes that dear child was a beacon of love. Life was cruel to him, yet his spirit shone through. He is in a far better place now. In many ways its a blessing, his disability would have led, I suspect, to a truly wretched life here. He left us while his spirit was untainted by the harshness of this life, especially in Drimiopsis, especially for those with no means to sustain themselves.

hugs
Geoff.

[jeanne]

Since Helge notified us of Ben's passing this morning I've been filled with a mixture of anguish for all the other children in the camp as well as thanksgiving that he must now be in a better place.

Al's already described the circumstances in which Ben lived. And indeed, he was curious and drawn to us from the time we first arrived in the camp! He literally shadowed us the whole time we were there.....following us around with his great big smile--so welcoming! He kept say "I'm fine"....like he was trying to connect with us with these two words he knew in English. He shadowed us throughout the camp -- endless high fives -- each time like it was the first, and he was BURSTING with laughter when we responded! His laughter was so contagious! And the memory of how Ben stroked Al's hairy arm when he was nervously speaking to the Elders will stay with us forever.

With this news this morning, Helge said they called for an ambulance from the nearest town to the Camp.....but it never came. Just imagine.... Ben lived on the ground, in the bush, or slept where ever he could find any shelter. No parents; bullied by the other children; only Helge and other volunteers to provide for his basic needs. And still, this precious boy brought joy and assurance to us - yes, Confucius message about Ben says it all.

I am sure Ben is in a better place now and we will never forget him. God Bless you, dear son and precious child. God Bless you and keep you, always, love, Jeanne

[Helge Mercker]

Thank you Al, Jeanne and Geoff for the tender words and love you shared with our Ben. His smile is indeed bigger and brighter now in his new home. What an inspiration he is, to demonstrate love in a world of such harshness and cruelty. Thank you for your contributions and joy you brought into his life. Blessings and love, Helge.

[Jane]

Thank you for sharing this story, this precious life. How was it possible that his soul could shine so brightly when
faced with such opposition? He is an example to us all. The story is so tragic and brought me tears but also I feel
like cheering that he has passed on to what we know is a much better place. He has gone home, to his real home.
God bless Ben!

[Maureen]

This touches me very deeply both as inspiration and heart felt sorrow.

The gifts for you Al are evident - Ben certainly allowed you to see a part within you that may need a little TLC and then he also gave you the reflection of his love, that part in you which you share with the world so openly because you can and you choose to! Healing our own by being loving to all parts of ourselves and the other soul.

Your experience with this young man remains forever, he has touched you deeply and what a beautiful feeling to know in spirit you will join again.

May his angels and family embrace him widely as he has transitioned into his new form of spirit.

Thank you for sharing this piece of you and Ben!

With love for all,
Maureen

[arie2012]

Thank you all for sharing this deeply touching story and especially you Al, for showing your own vulnerability in such sincere way.

I'm so glad to have this inner certainty too that little Ben is in a better place now where he can further develop his beautiful soul, without all those horrible impediments of his earthly life.

Among all the misery that we've made of our beautiful world the fate of all those suffering children touches me most and without my faith I wouldn't even want to be here anymore..

Good to have you folks..

Love,
Arie

[DennisT]

When Helge first broke the news of Ben's passing, I was truly saddened. However, now that I have heard the rest of Al, Jeanne ands Geoff's experiences in this young lad's life, I have a feeling he is a special soul. I should be lucky enough if I am remotely close to the sphere he is in, and I should consider it my fortune to one day stroke this spirit's arm as I am sure he is filled with such Love. I only hope that he is still following Al, Jeanne and Geoff, all the while learning of the Father's Great Love.

Love and hugs,

Dennis

[Terry Adler]

Thank you Al for your beautiful tribute to your friend Ben. As I read your words, I pray for this child, with gratitude for the strength of his soul, with compassion for what he endured in his short life, fully believing he will continue to grow in Divine Love and that our prayers together with those of the Angels will guide him to the Light that his soul reflected so powerfully.
I bless Ben and thanks to your words, hold him in my heart forever.
Love,
Terry

[Geoff]

I only hope that he is still following Al, Jeanne and Geoff, all the while learning of the Father's Great Love.

Love and hugs,

Dennis

Dear Dennis,

I recall my dear friend Brenda from Barbados having two spirit children who followed her all day, so yes, it does happen.

hugs
Geoff